THAT Kind of Friend!!

I have a friend. We have been friends for years. Actually, he was my brother's friend since elementry school. I will call him Jake (cause in highschool that was my friend and my code name for him) After graduation I went home for a visit and he and I ended up having a drunken shag. Since then we have talked on the phone, emailed and anytime I go out to my mom's he comes down to play. When J went home to New Zealand, and we were apart for 8 months we agreed that whatever happened - happened. I would rather have sex with someone else between us, then a cheat or betrayal. (it backfired in a way that an agreement like that only could-but that is a whole other story!!) Jake flew out to BC and we spent a week hanging out in a hotel room. This has been going on for 12 years.

Over the years it has been long since noted and documented that this boy has a sense of when I need to hear from him. Without fail, if I am feeling a bit down, having a rough go with some boy or another, or not feeling great about myself, he calls or emails. It is uncanny!! Jake was emailing me when I was in Canada last summer (when J wasnt!). With things rough between J and I, and having physical access to Jake, I didnt email him back. I didnt want to put myself in a situation that would make things worse. He emailed me just after J and I broke up too. It was a bit to raw to talk about it then-EVERY email since he found out I was with J, he asks directly "are you still with J?" I recieved another such email the other night. I finally responed. There is now talk of meeting somewhere in South-East Asia as I don't think I will be in Canada for another year.

It is really strange though. We have NOTHING in common, just history. I am not even sure what he sees in me. He is HOT! Like the kind of hot that I would usually make fun of because he knows it and it is paired with 'cool' and 'money'. When he came out to see me in BC some of my friends were gagging! I think for him I was his pubescent fantasy (best friends older sister) and I have just held this ongoing allure somehow. For me, well, he makes me feel so good about myself. We have fun together. I make fun of his shallow vanity and he makes fun of me for being a hippy. There is nothing deep about it. A few friends have joked that he and I will end up together, and there is ZERO chance of that, he would drive me crazy. But for what he is, he is great!!!