Have You Seen My Spark?

I was going to post about the boss and ex...but it has turned into a non-issue. The boss almost gave some of my hours to the ex. I quit. She came sucking up, saying all the right things, offering more money and the hours I want. As well as alieveated some work visa pressure. So two times a week in the evenings, I work at the same school as ex does. He applied and got a job at my old job. I don't think that I will be working with him often. I think that is for the best....but I don't want to talk about him, or why he came to my school of all the schools in this bloody county. I don't want to talk about her, why she thought that it would be ok to announce that I would no longer be needed one night a week because my ex wanted those hours....but what do I want to talk about?

Where has my mind been lately. My post holiday manicness has subsided, but I am still happy. I feel like I am bobbling along alright. Nothing exciting and new, but nothing dreadful and bad. I am lacking a bit of spark right now. I wonder if it is something as simple as the fact that I don't even have a crush right now. Am I that superficial that my life becomes a bit flat without a potential love interest. The rainbow is still a bit of a crush, but he is more a crush in theory than reality. I had a crush on him when I was with ex, so he is more just a fun crush. I have been persued as of late by a boy that has not made my blog yet. We have hung out 4 days out of the last 7. Although there has been nothing physical he did make me a mix CD. I am not sure how I feel about him, nor what is the intention of his persuit. Up until recently my strongest emotion towards him had been annoyance...but this past week we have had a really good time and I am enjoying him immensly....but no big sparks, so I am just going with the flow.

Maybe it is the weather. It has been cold and dreary. I have tried to embrace it knowing the stiffling heat is immenent...but it is SO cold! Not cold like Canada cold...but raining, wet, driving a scooter, houses and schools without insolation or heaters, I just wanna curl up on the couch with my fuzzy blanket and dog and watch movies and drink tea, cold.

Maybe is is because I am behind on my online course and having trouble finding the motivation to get at it. I keep meaning to, but I am just having trouble finding the focus. The final paper is due, like this week and I havent even started it!!! ARRG!

Maybe it is just a post manic flat. I think it is probably a combination of all of them. When I think about my life, I smile. I am happy. I wouldnt change anything...but going through the motions of the day is a bit of a struggle today! I will force myself to the gym this afternoon, and get a good nights sleep tonight. Tomorrow is another day!