I'm a Rainbow Too!

"Reality continues to ruin my life." - Bill Watterson, Calvin and Hobbes.

Thursday, March 31, 2005

Past time of Gods!!

As I sit here with my sleeping pill hangover I am left pondering the subject that was fist inspired in the early stages of sleeping pill grog...sleep!! What a wonderful, necessary, fickle thing it is. Maybe it is because I have suffered from periodic insomnia since I was about 12, and not a great sleeper at the best of times, but I LOVE sleep.
The fact that my body can deny me sleep is such a cruel fate. There is nothing more horrible than being dead tired, or having important plans in the morning, and climbing into bed only to have my brain turn on to high gear. I realized last night that most of my insomnia nights are accompanied by a soundtrack....a one lined repetative soundtrack, usually a song, but sometimes just a catchy phrase. J can not even comprehend how I can have so little control over my own mind, but I just have to sit back and watch the little show that my mind puts on for me. In those instances I do start to question my own sanity.
So then come out the pharmacuticals. I partake as infrequently as possible. I don't like the hangover, even if it is minor, and the sleep itself isnt nearly as satisfying as the old-fashioned organic stuff. There have been times though, that just the threat of them has let my mind know there is a back of plan, so it relaxes and lets me go!!
The other way that I can sometimes convince my mind to relax is by rearranging my day so that I can sleep in. Without the impending early morning rise, my mind will often realize its not worth the effort, and just shut off. There are times when the possibility of nap the next day can do the same thing!!One of my favorite feeling in the world is during a period in my life when there is no time for a lie-in, getting home in the middle of the day, nobody home, no plans and an hour or two to kill. I can crawl into bed and actually have wee fits of excitiment. YAY SLEEP!!!!
It just feels so good!! Even going back to bed in the mornings is a treat. J is a morning person, so does not get the part AT ALL! How great is the feeling of waking up to do what all people do in the morning, and realize that you have an hour before you have to get up, HURRAH!! I have mastered the art of taking care of mother nature's call without ever fully waking up. I trudge down the stairs to the bathroom and back up again in a dozy blissful state. I only now realize why J likes me in this state so much. It's not that he likes me dumb, only that I am purely happy!!!

Sunday, March 27, 2005

It's my first time...

My first blog... I have been thinking what I should write about for this momentous occasion since last night, when my cousin L created the account for me. For some reason I feel like my first entry should be thoughtful and poignent... Being a Canadian teaching English in Taiwan I thought about a 'stranger in a strange land' angle. Then I tossed around the idea of blogging about blogging. What is this vain, anonymous publishing of inner thoughts, and what does it say about our culture? But returning from a huge Easter brunch, I am too full, and I must say hungover, to really come out with anything too profound!! In fact that is about all i have to say about anything. Maybe it's best...short and sweet, and now the first time pressure is off. Being fairly certain that my thoughts and opinions are of the utmost public interest, I think that i am going to like this blogging thing!!!!