Look at me....two posts in a week!! Woohoo! How are you all going to keep up? hahaha

I have an hour to kill between jobs, and nothing specific to say, so it will be a bit of a ramble; (that semi colon was for you bevis..still working on that tag!) not that my posts are usually anything but!

Still pretty blissed out about life. My new job has its shit, but it is shit I understand. Working in Taiwan you see this whole other side of business, that really seems illogical to the western mind! The school that I am at now is very established with many waigoran (foriegn) teachers. They are more accustomed to the whims of the westeren worker than most schools here. And man, I love the kids!! I have agreed to stay on at my old school for two nights a week, and she has agreed to give me more money...win-win really!

Ex is trying to get a job at this school-he has subbed for me there before. My boss very thoughtfully came to me and asked how I would feel about this (something ex wouldnt think of doing). I told her that it was fine as long as there stuff remained between them. I didnt want to play go-between for them, and she agreed. It really is fine too. We went for lunch and he sought advice and counsel-as he does. I was left wondering what how I ever thought that he was 'the one'. I understand why I was with him, and I have no regrets there! But what I don't understand, is the delusion that there was something BIG there. He could never have lived up to the image of him I had created. I almost feel bad for him, because I think he had known this for quite awhile.

The only 'pang' I had was when I teased him for being hung over on a weekday, and he replied "Well, it was Valintines Day". Now, I don't regret missing out on the grandious romantic gesture of "hey baby, let's go get pissed. I'll buy the first round"! Nor do I even wish him to be single. I just get a pang that it is her, that he definitely started dating her within two months of moving out of here, and I am pretty sure that he was seeing her up to a month before that. I don't have ANY feeling of annomisity towards her, but that relationship represents such raw emotion in me. When I found out he was dating I fell apart. All the delusions came crashing down around me. I was left feeling an idiot. My heart and soul were flung open and left dangle like washing on the line. For the first time in my life I wasn't in control of myself.

The logical side of me appreciates this. I felt like I have never felt before....and I have had my share of shit! I embraced it and made it my own and wouldnt give it up. I also realize that had he not been the insensitive, self serving boy that he is, those delusions may still be in tact...BUT, their relationship still turns a little knife in me. If started dating her now, I would be happy enough for them. If they broke up and he started dating someone new I could fathom having a conversation with her...but as it is I just don't see it. I saw her at the gym last night and my heart leapt.

It doesnt help that the one time that I could have met her was at a party that Ex handled in typical style. Didnt warn her that I would be there (did warn me though), didnt introduce us., left us sitting on opposite sides of a coffee table pretending we were having the times of our lives with the people we were talking to. Poor girl didnt even know anyone there, it was my crowd, who rallied around me and made sure that I always had something to throw my head back and laugh about. She ended up leaving, and he stayed on! This behaviour did not surprise anyone who knew him!!

Anyway, he has just taken up more blogspace than is really warrented for my state of mind, but at this moment it was on my mind. Lunch yesterday, new girlfriend last night, at my work tonight..

In other news...Anyone who has been reading for awhile might remember the post A RAINBOW LEFT TAIWAN. Well said Rainbow is coming back to Taiwan, TOMORROW!! Yay! I am most excited about this. Very cool guy, object of long term, minor crush! When ever we have gone out and I have been a bit too messed, he has been my home base, my goto guy! It is interesting, cause when he left I was in the midst of my heartache. He and I talked about it, and he was a great listener. So much has changed since then! I am excited for him to meet truely happy me! When I think about it, he never has. I havent been truely happy since shortly after Ex joined me in Taiwan. It feels soooooooooooo gooooood!!!!!

Alright, that is my ramble for today! I am off to take my lurvely dog for a walk! I hope you all have a super weekend!

Alive and Giddy

I know I owe Bevis a tag...And I have been working on it, but I have been so insanely busy that I need to write a little update so I don't get in any more shit from Auburn and Meghan!

Life in the real world has been, well; brilliant! The holiday was enough to fill my soul and give a whole new slant to this thing called life. I have been happy to the point of giddy and manic. I have been driving poor cousin Leah bonkers with my happy sighs and giggles, about nothing specific!

I started a new job at a kindergarten after New year (Chinese) and I love it. I am told daily that I am beautiful and loved (and have a big nose and am fat, but we don't dwell on that!) by gorgeous little munchkins. It is a well renowned school and so they are privileged kids with a high level of English for their age (3-5). I sing, play games and pretend to teach...And get paid well for it!!

I am still working evenings at the old job, so I work on and off from 9 am to 9pm. On top of that I have been going to the gym (mostly yoga classes and swimming) before work in the mornings. I have been exhausted, in a good way. Almost everyday over the past week and a half I have lunched with different friends or had Chinese lessons with a great friend.

Tomorrow I am having lunch with the ex....I don't really have feelings either way about it....YAY ME!! There is a whole new mile between us since I have been back, and it is my mile! He is looking to get a job at my evening school...I am cutting my hours back there so I don't really mind at all...meh!

As for the holiday and the other boys...Well not so much to tell! Boy number 2 was fun and sexy and we were laughing to the point of tears and stitches in our sides.He lives in a town about an hour from me in Taiwan, and 'his friends were going to love me, blah blah blah'..And then he did a Mr. Hyde and actually said the words "So, you go down on me, I go down on you" and had the audacity to be angry when I respectfully declined. Yes, angry. I ever so politely explained that I was feeling a wee bit weary and that it was time for all good girls to get there beauty sleep....Ass hole!

Boy number 3 was in a band at a bar I went to in Manila. They were a great Filipino cover band and did all the songs from my 20s. REM, the Cure, Ramones, New Order...It was great. He was the bass player, he was VERY cute!! We made eye contact during the set. After they came and sat with us. My friend that lives in Manila, the band and I did some bar hopping and ended up drinking outside the 7-11 and just being silly. Just some pleasant smooches and email exchange. He was sweet and gentle and made me feel wonderful. He had spent the past 16 years in California and left his IT job to come back to the Philippines for a year and play in this band.

Final tidbit before I go to sleep. If this was a post in itself it could follow steph's lead with title "reasons I am an idiot...." But I prefer "Another example of how I am truly blessed, and how that holiday was meant to be the best holiday of my life!!"

Initially cousin Leah was planning to come to Boracay with me. When she realized she couldn't afford it and cancelled her ticket, our travel agent misunderstood and cancelled mine too. We were going to come back on the Saturday afternoon. When he rebooked my flight he had trouble getting my flight back and I was waitlisted for a bit and ended up with a bit of a stopover in Hong Kong, no biggie. He told me the flight was the 3rd, and for some idiotic reason, I assumed it was the same day as the initial ticket...

Flashforward 2 weeks. Saturday afternoon I rock up to the Aquino international airport nice and early with a skip in my step and a smirk on my face. Security is tight and at the door a guy with a machine gun asks to see my ticket. I flash him a smile and hand it over...."This flight was yesterday"
"No, no, the third, Saturday..." Yeah, who's smiling now...Could have knocked me over with a feather. I head up to the airline office....
"I am seeing when we can get you on the next flight....Just so you know I am already on the 8th and it is all booked"
fuck fuck fuck fuck nononononono!!!!!
My dog is waiting.I start a new job on Monday. I am ready to be home. This can't be happening! I ask about stanby. He tells me that he can waitlist me for the flight I thought I was supposed to be on. The connection from HongKong is OK, but the flight to HongKong is pretty tight..

I bring the ticket down to the check in counter...The flight is at 5:45 and it is 4:00 now. He tells me that it doesn't look good and to come back at 5:00. I tell him that if he can get me on this flight I will love him forever...He smiles!

I sitdown-on the ground as there are no chairs in the check in lounge. Tears well up. I talk myself down. I can go back to Tricia's overnight, I am sure there are a few flights I could waitlist on Sunday, and worst case I will check out prices with the other airlines...I will get home to my dog and my own bed in time for the new job...I stare bleakly at the clock counting the minutes until 5:00.

At about 5 to 5 I notice a lot of people milling around the counter of the man who holds my fate. I decide to get in there lest he forgets about me! At about 5 past 5 the crowd has grown and he steps out with a stack of boarding passes....10 names called, none of them mine. A few minutes later he steps out with about 5 more...Again my name was not called. At quarter past 5, bags still at my feet he comes out with about 8 more. My name was called at number 6. He hands me the boarding pass and smiles....First Class baby!!!

Boy Number 1

It had been a little overcast so I walked over to the other side of the island. The side where the kite boarders hang out. I met a filipino girl there and she introduced me to several HOT kite and wind surfers. I was meeting her out later. I saddled up to my seat at the bar. I was happy, I was glowing. The boys at the bar were taking there turns chatting with me as I ate my dinner and drank my drinks. The DJ came on, house is by no means my favourite music, but he was good-really good. Sheila and the boys showed up and the dancing ensued-barefoot in the sand dancing! There wasnt a big crowd, but they were all up for a good time!

I noticed 2 guys and a girl rock up. The one guywas awfully cute he and I made eye contact as soon as they walked in - flirty smiles were exchanged. I sized up the dynamic between the three and was pretty confident that no combination of the 3 was a couple. The music kept on, we kept on dancing. More eye contact, more smiles. Soon we were dancing next to each other. He introduced himself, we smiled, we kept on dancing. "Where are you from, What do you do, How long you here for" our eyes stayed locked, the music surged on, we smiled and we kept on dancing.

The police truck was driving up the sandy path so the 'dance floor' was briefly cleared. He pulled me back into him, he ran his hand up my back and grabbed the hair at nape of my neck. Our eyes met and this time we didnt smile. We walked down to the shore line and chatted. I am sure the 2 hours of pumping house music, dancing under the stars in the sand, eyes locked sexual tension played a part of it, but the chemistry was explosive.

We changed bars with his friends and found a corner to talk. I was tracing on his back and he was massaging my other hand. The conversation was easy and the sexual tension was palpable. He squeezed the back of my neck and we pressed our heads together. We grabbed each others hands and without speaking a word stood up to leave.

The walk home that usually took me 15 minutes stretched out for 40. The first half was 20 minutes of hairpulling, hand squeezing not quite kissing. We taunted and teased for what seemed like ever. I have not wanted to kiss someone as bad as I wanted to kiss him and I was loving the longing! Finally we gave in and it was hungry, hard, head spinning, knee weakening toe curling, leave us both speachless and grinning, good.

We spent a day and two nights together. He was a really sweet guy that made me feel amazing and was not shy to let me know that I made him feel the same way. He was perfectly happy to kiss and cuddle and laugh and chat and make out a little. Nothing could ever compare to that walk home. I have missed that build up to a first kiss SO much. I think it is one of my favourite things in the world. We exchanged emails and he left back to Holland after the 2 nights. We may email, probably, but it was perfect in what it was.

You asked for details girls...and that was boy number one....there were 2 more. One not nearly as sweet in the end though. I am back home now, and happy to be so. I feel like I was gone a full lifetime. I feel like something has changed in me. It was a perfect holiday, by far the best one I have ever been on. I am off to bed now. I have been catching up on you all a bit, and I will start commenting tomorrow!!